Thursday, December 17, 2009

The Cook - 100 words

It seems I need to edit this. So here goes

The secret to cooking was patience. Don knew this, but time was not on his side here. Outside forces Unexpected company had forced his hand. Company They would be dropping by arriving in less than three hours. Here he was cleaver in hand trying to figure which appendage body part to chop up first. The 20 gallon pot was just starting to warm. There would be no time to offer up a proper feast. A quick stew comprised of smaller cuts would have to do. First he needed to remove the rings and that watch. Metal never added much to the taste of a good stew.

I kept seeing these 100 word challenges so I thought some practice was in order. Show some "patience" if you will while I cooked up something that was 100 words long, yet still conveyed a complete meal, uh I mean story.

After the comments, I realized this effort was not even close to my usual mediocre attempts. Taking everyone's comments to mind, I have redone it. Makes more sense now I think.


Middle Ditch said...

What's in the stew??????

Demeur said...

What's in the stew? Knowing Crum you don't want to know.

Laura said...

Ewwwww! MIKE! :D
What is it with you guys and gore!?
Can't we have a nice story about kittens?
Scratch that.. :P


Randal Graves said...

Kittens are kind of gamey. We taste like chicken.

David Barber said...

I've heard Kittens taste kinda fishy or am I thinking Pussies??

Enjoyed this Mike. Check your email.

All the best, David.

Commander Zaius said...

I'll just stick with possum, its sort of a tradition down here.

Commander Zaius said...

Great story, great imagery.

BBC said...

Having cooked in a cafe for a while I didn't have time for patience, shit had to get done fast and in the proper order.

I got fired for not having patience with a waitress that didn't sanitize the salad work station before using it and getting on her even though I had told her at the start of her shift to do such.

In a kitchen the cook should be the ruler, but she was young and attractive and sexy so the boss took her side.

Whateverthefuck, I didn't care about getting fired as long as I wasn't seen as being responsible for anyone getting sick on our shift.

BBC said...

Randal.... Cats are too much work to gut and skin to bother with the amount of meat you get off of one.

Stick with dogs.

MRMacrum said...

Middle Ditch & Demeur - I think I cleared it up with the edit.

sunshine - I could always combine the two and come up with a helpful post of what to do with a dead kitten. Of course I would just be riding on others coattails. There are complete books about this.

Randal - I always thought we tasted more like frog's legs.

David Barber - Kittens taste fine as long as you use the proper marinate.

Beach Bum - Um, possum huh? Now there's some imagery.

BBC - Depends on the size of the dog.

David Barber said...

Good one Mike. I like it.

Laura said...

It's still gory. ;P

I think we all just got caught in in talking about pussies.. ;P

It's a great story! :)


Randal Graves said...

I'm starting to wonder if sunshine doesn't work in the adult entertainment field. Where's our porn tales!

Hey, what happened to the other photo?

MRMacrum said...

David Barber - Yes, it works better now.

sunshine - Look. Ah'm a True Blue John Wayne lovin 'Murican. We likes stories with bite. Takin out all the gore might give soma you folks the pression ah's a stinkin Liberal.

Randal - This blog does not allow dirty thoughts to invade this sanctified space. Sex - not OK. Blood and guts - OK . Got it? Okay then.

I shit-canned the other picture when I found this one. Why? Shit I don't know.