When Will It End?

I had hopes I would never see a mass shooting here in Maine. My hopes were dashed the other day when a maniac shot up a bar and a bowling alley in a town up country from me in what we call  L.A. (Lewiston - Auburn).  As of today, 18 are dead and 7 or 8 are in various states of medical Hell at the local hospital.

Yeah, my hopes were dashed, but I wasn't surprised. We have become a country filled with a fear and loathing of our own making. We have allowed merchants of death and chaos to create an atmosphere where all of us have lost trust in each other, condemned each other for the differences we carry, and now live in fear of each other.

My good FB friend, Jackie Sue, posted a meme that asked, "When will it end?"

I thought about it. I am of a mind that I see no end in sight. We will just have to wear ourselves out purging all this pent up fear and rage we have allowed to poison our souls.

Sadly, I do not think the stupidity has peaked yet.

Later ..........................

_____________________

"Here Without You", by 3 Doors Down seems an appropriate tune at this time.

April 5th, 1968

This should have been just another away game like so many others I would experience while a student at Charlotte Hall Military Academy in the late 1960's. But it wasn't. That day was a singular experience I would revisit time and time again over the next 54 years. 

It was the last game of the season. St. Albans Prep in Washington, DC was the destination. The lacrosse team stepped off the team bus around noon I guess. We enjoyed a great feed in a fancy dining hall with white gloved waiters serving up the food. Sort of like Charlotte Hall, but more intimate and fancier; certainly quieter. 

I realized sitting there that I could have gone to St. Albans, but I chose Charlotte Hall instead. What the Hell was I thinking? Then I remembered that I hated the snobby St. Alban punks I knew from my neighborhood in Bethesda. I had chosen the right place. I would not have lasted at St. Albans given the size of the chip I was hauling around at the time.

The normal chatter that filled the air was absent that day. Instead, a somber mood had settled over everyone. Most of the talk seemed to be about the shooting of Martin Luther King the day before and the rioting that exploded almost immediately coast to coast. 

We found the locker room, changed into our uniforms and were directed to the field. The team benches faced easterly. Almost immediately it seemed everyone was looking to the southeast. In the not so far distance, multiple plumes of smoke were billowing skyward. Coach DiMaggio quickly refocused everyone to the task at hand; he said in effect,

" Nothing to see there guys. Nothing you can do. Let's play some lacrosse." 

Mickey Dimaggio was a very single minded man when it came to his interactions with the K-dets. He did not change topics, he did not lose sight of his points, he made you stay focused, often with a wack from his lacrosse stick or a sharp tug on your helmet. Damn, I miss that man.

His attempt to refocus me only partially worked. The whole time I sat on the bench, I would spend more time staring at the smoke billowing up to the southeast just a few miles from my nation's capitol. It upset me. 

I think that day and the turmoil that followed bothered many people. And as it turns out, now here in 2022, it seems we still haven't learned. The same hate and discontent from back then has just been repackaged in a cloak of different verbiage, while the heart of the hate and discontent still remains solidly embedded in our collective souls.

That is what really makes me sad.

Keep it 'tween the ditches ........................................

__________________________________

Only one group came to mind when it came to picking a tune for this post. Please enjoy the group, "War" and their excellent tune, "The World is a Ghetto".

Someone Else's Blues

It has been a week since I posted anything online. Not on my blog, Not on Facebook. Not on Twitter. I did not consciously take time off. It just happened.

I think my missing in action status was kicked off by a commercial NBC runs regularly hawking their kid's online news program, "Nightly News with Lester Holt, Kid's Edition". To add some beef to the ad, they offer several three or four second moments of children asking questions about current events. I cannot remember from one viewing to another any of the kid's questions or comments with the exception of one ten year old who looks straight at the camera and asks:

"Can you tell me what is going on?"

Every time I see this commercial now, I snarl at the screen, 

"Never mind the kids, please tell me what the fuck is going on first."

This is how confused, disappointed and really pissed off I am now. I feel myself wanting to just hide under a rock, spark up a Doob, and let the waning years left to me pass by as painlessly as possible. ......... Hmm.

So I crawled into a convenient hole and sulked these past days. The wound of a thousand cuts spread over forty years are so extensive, licking them is no longer an option. But then neither is caving and becoming the type of drooling minion the Right loves; one who does not complain or ask questions. Fear filled populations are easier to control. So the Right pours on the hate, pours on the lies, they never give up. They are relentless.

I often think the Right Wingers' brow beating ways and their use of outrageous made up Bull Shit has finally worn down my last nub. But as I said, that is the result they want. If they can't convert, turning me into another apathetic asshole works just as well, ........ maybe better. 

Contrary to the Right's claim only they are the moral, high ideal love of humanity group, they actually have no real interest in ideology or policy that works for our mutual benefit. They offer up vague slippery tongued promises of good times in the future if we will only follow them and submit to their obvious superior plans. But their plans in recent years have not lived up to their promises. All they want to do is to dial back the clock and rescind rights so many fought for these last 60-70 years. That is not a path forward. That is painful atrophy. Every major change they have forced down our throats always seem to only help the missions of a select few or fill the pockets of their leadership and good buddies in board rooms around the world. 

I know that this country I now have trouble identifying with went through these changes incrementally one fuck up at a time. While both the Right and the Left had a part in the madness, the Right was more enthusiastic and eager to put the screws to the majority of us who considered people by their content, not their looks, their sexual identity, or what religion they bent their knees to. 

Sadly it appears they may have their way, and are now poised for a successful takeover of the USA for some years to come. At best, I see us in the near future living in a Corporate Autocracy. At worse, we end up a Fascist state or even worse, a Theocracy. Those kind of evils have been hiding in the shadows forever. This may be their time in the Sun,

As Jackie, my good internet friend from Texas has said for years:

"We are so fucked."

The time needed to change the horizon we are heading for grows short. 

Later .............................................

___________________________________________

I know, I know ..... Music to whine by, complain by, face the evil heading our by. This may take some time.

REM's tune, "It's the end of the World"  covers things nicely I guess. 

But as a bonus tune I came across while looking for more specific to the point of the post music is "Someone Else's Blues" by one of my all time favorite musicians, David Bromberg, because I guess I have been waking up lately with "Someone Else's Blues".

The New American Idiots

I would love to pat myself on the back for being able to fight the good fight against Right Wing lies, deceits, rampant hypocrisy, and yes, even treasonous behavior since Reagan and his evil bride Nancy first squatted in the White House in January, 1981. 

I look back on those times as idyllic compared to the horror show we have now forty one years later. At least in the 1980s, 1990s and the first few years of the new century, once the leaders from both sides of the aisle had beaten their favorite dead horses and championed their partisan views, they often found common ground, met in the middle and moved this country forward. 

Bipartisanship was a real thing back then. 

Now, twenty years later, any hope of cooperation from the Right has totally vanished. Any hope of the Left growing some balls has evaporated also. What we have today is an intractable gridlock that is exactly what the Right wanted. America is now controlled lock, stock and barrel by a nasty selfish minority while the Left stands on the sidelines wringing their hands and whining like little bitches.

The party of No, the GOP, has successfully ground the USA to a halt and are now busy demolishing any remnants of our great past in order to turn this country into a fiefdom for God and the Fortune 500. In the meantime, the Right has convinced enough of the their brain dead followers that feeding the Fortune 500 is the most patriotic thing they can do. It is sad so many people in this country are so stupid.

And though I blame the Right for most of the political and social carnage that has swept the land these past two decades, they could not have done it without the unforced errors committed by the Left. Instead of focusing on the issues swirling around the center, the Left allowed their fringe to push the agenda of social progress rather than the nuts and bolts of political realities. While Left Wingers are more likely to lend a sympathetic ear to the needs of exploited and forgotten populations, they can't do anything if they don't have a solid majority that has to include as much of the Center as possible. Policy and progress has to come from the center moving outwards, not shrinking from the edges in.

What it boils down to is The Right are mean, stupid bullies. The Left are a bunch of Nancies who are scared of the Winger bullies on the other side of the aisle. And frankly I am fed up with the both of them. And now that Maine has passed a law creating semi-open primaries for the 2024 election cycle, I am dropping the D next to my name on the voting rolls and replacing it with an I. 

Up until the Right went totally off the rails, I would often vote for the candidate and not the party. Beginning in 2008 I became a straight ticket voter. I voted against rather than for. No Republican has had my support since then. And now that I can vote in primary elections as an unaffiliated voter, I am all done with the Democrats except on election days. My votes from now on will always be against the Right, no matter who is running.

I am so, so very tired of the two party scam that has this country by its short hairs.

Fuck the Right.

Later .....................................................

________________________________

"American Idiot", by Green Day fits so well in the current cluster fuck that is America today. That Green Day released this song in 2004 points out how the cluster fucking began long, long ago. 

"American Idiot", Lyrics

Songwriters: Michael Pritchard / Billie Joe Armstrong / Frank Wright

American Idiot lyrics © W.b.m. Music Corp., Green Daze Music

Thoughts On Ukraine

I read somewhere in the last few days that at the moment, over twenty armed conflicts are currently tearing some part of the planet apart and turning men and women into widows, widowers, and orphans. Most of the conflicts have been ongoing for awhile now. Some have been around for years.

Why then do I feel so much more sadness over what is happening in Ukraine? Shouldn't I put this recent invasion into an "oh well" perspective like the others? 

Another straw breaking another camel's back comes to mind. I am simply fed up with assholes, autocrats, despots, dictators, and religious zealots. Not a one of them are doing anything positive for the planet or the human race. 

I do have a friend living in Ukraine. He is a Canadian who has lived there a long time. We hooked up online I guess 15 years ago or so. He and his family are in my thoughts more now than ever before. That connection to the chaos might explain how awful I feel right now. But I don't think that is the whole story.

After almost 70 years on this planet, I have finally run out of patience for the evil stupidity humans foist upon other humans. Putin's insistence on ravaging another country to ease his angst over losing the good ole days has touched one of my last raw nerves. And once again I have to deal with sitting on the sidelines and wringing my hands. 

It seems like this century is going to suck no matter what we do. Its been one horror show after another for twenty two straight years now. You'd think we would be tired of  all the pain and anguish, death and destruction; and especially tired of assholes like Vladimir Putin.

But no. Humans are not done screwing each other for no good reason at all. Humanity appears to be in the throes of a seriously dangerous readjustment period and there are only three choices open to those folks experiencing the horror of killers at their door. 

Run, Fight, or Die.

An Infuriating After Note

A Russian diplomat was interviewed yesterday or today. With a straight face she pleaded with the population of Ukraine to put down their arms. It will make it so much easier on them in the long run. After all, Russians are there to help save them.

Apparently the Ukrainians are not interested in the kind of "saving" Russia has in mind for them. Ukraine has embraced the sentiments of Dylan Thomas, and will not go gently into the good night. Instead they seem intent on raging against the dying of the light.

Later ............................................. 

____________________________________

No song is more appropriate than this one by Rage Against the Machine - "Killing in the Name"

Does He Eat Dogs?

Vlad the Invader has decided to once again bully his way into Ukraine. Why should America even care?  That is what many Winger pundits are asking. 

Tucker Carlson has indicated that the collective we, who make up the American public, have been trained to hate Putin. Two days ago on Fox News he asked:

"........ since it is getting pretty serious: What is this really about? Why do I hate Putin so much? Has Putin ever called me a racist? Has he threatened to get me fired for disagreeing with him? Has he shipped every middle-class job in my town to Russia. Did he manufacture a worldwide pandemic that wrecked my business and kept me indoors for two years? Is he teaching my children to embrace racial discrimination? Is he making fentanyl? Is he trying to snuff out Christianity? Does he eat dogs?" 

Tucker is a smart guy who never crosses the line between reality and fantasy. His evening diatribes are always well thought out and the charges he makes against those awful Democrats are always spot on. .......... Right?

Yes, his questions might seem reasonable to his target audience. 

But as usual, he uses a classic distraction of comparing apples to oranges and managing once again to not make sense at the same time. What a stupid man some people look up to.

His point however about why we should not care is interesting. 

Sitting here 5000 miles or so away from the Russian invasion in a country most of us will never be able to identify without help, why should we get our panties in a bunch over this? For me, the half ass student of history that I am, well, I find it amazing that we even have to have a conversation over why it matters that Vlad has invaded another country. 

Yeah, we have our own problems. Every one has problems. We are tired of being the World's cop. ... Blah, blah, blah. 

Focusing solely on our own internal issues only allows the external problems blowing up outside our borders to mutate into situations we might be forced to confront with more aggression than if we addressed them in the beginning or better yet preemptively. 

Certainly "not caring" about what happens in Ukraine is short sighted and stupid. But that is what the Wingers want. They strive hard to keep us stupid every day with their non-stop line of anti American Bull Shit. And who better to hold up as someone to admire than Vlad the Invader.? And who better than Tucker to fill us up with the lies?

Joe Biden may or may not deserve the initial criticism he is shouldering. Personally, I am holding my own opinion for awhile to see how his sanctions and troop movements play out. I am puzzled that his sanctions hit three of Putin's buddies in the Russo-oligarch club, but so far it appears Biden has not gone after Putin personally. 

The Right falsely infuses everything they do, say, and wear with empty Patriotism. From the lapel pins to their draping themselves in the flag every moment of every day is just plain bullshit. Sadly, Tucker's target audience does not see through the bullshit. They just see the flag their GOP idols disrespect almost every time they open their mouths. It's no wonder they suck up the admiration their leaders have shown for Vlad the Invader.

Regardless, I am not helping Russia by tacitly condoning their occupation with mealy mouthed sentiments or the outright admiration shown by many leaders of the Right. Foreign policy is a board game we need to attack with a united front. The Right does not care. They only care about defeating the Democrats. And if rooting for another country to undermine a current President's efforts to find peace works in their favor; so be it. After Jan 6 this is nowhere near as serious. Fuck America, right Tucker?

Problem is, their strategy is most likely to take us all down leaving a shit pile for them to lord over.

Later .......................................

_____________________________

"War Pigs" by Black Sabbath was going to be the tune for today's post. Then I googled "Anti-Russian music". This tune is called "Putin Khuylo" (Putin is a Dickhead). It emerged around 2010, was used during Russia's incursion in 2014. Russian tight asses have done their best to bury this worldwide trend and have been unsuccessful. This is but one version of many.

Fearless Nature - 100 words

I was rooting through old pictures yesterday searching for specific Kodak moments from my past. The images I sought were not found. Instead, unexpected images caught my eye. I pulled out my smart phone and copied a few of them.

The one to the left is my daughter and I enjoying her first trip up a ladder. She was not even three yet.

Though tentative, there is no panic on her face. It was an early glimpse into the fearless nature she would grow into as she took on each new challenge in her young life.

She made me proud.

Covidiots

 

Biting Off Their Nose to Spite Their Face

So, I have tried hard to not lose myself in a rant about anything Covid. It was easy at first. I just blew off any extended focus on the ring of stupidity that surrounded the pandemic. It was just more mindless madness kept in play by the Trump Death Cult.

You know them. They are the bozos who insist on using stupidity to make a point that will somehow own us. They would rather own us and put us in our place by using their right to be stupid. Common Sense has long since vacated their cranial voids. Getting over on the rest of us is more important than their own health, their loved one's health, or the health of the community they exist in. An almost “Kill us all, God will sort us out later" kind of mentality.

What it shows me, well, I gave up trying to figure that out. They are now just selfish lunatics on the wrong side of the fence as far as I am concerned.

For too long I have tolerated Covidiots with their stupidity, their embracing of hearsay bullshit, and general Fuck You selfishness over communal health. My tolerance and understanding quiver is now empty. I can no longer concern myself with what happens to the No Vaxers. Any trouble, pain, or disrespect they receive now is their own fault. They are brain dead to me.

Day in and day out, common sense information saturates the many media platforms pointing out the obvious benefits to everyone if everyone gets vaccinated. Other than extreme cases, there is no reason that even approaches being a sane reason to not be vaccinated.

So what reasoning does that leave the Typhoid Trumpers for their resistance? What is left is a disorganized cluster fuck of idiotic mealy mouthed claims of rights violations and unproven conspiratorial allegations. What is really going on is that being stubbornly stupid is in their minds their path to religious and patriotic Heaven. God and/or Trump have shown them the way.

What a bunch of rubes.

It does appear there is an easing of the Anti-Vaxers inflexible grip on Stupidity as it relates to Covid. The Delta Variant of Covid 19 is winning converts among the empty minded minions of the Right. The Delta Variant is ripping the unvaccinated a new asshole. And now the foxhole they were sure only God existed in is making room for Bill Nye the science guy. The result is a rise in vaccinations over the previous plateau stubbornly supported by the stupid. And this a good thing, but I am past handing out any "atta boy's". Stupid does not deserve any kind of reward or encouragement.

I know, I know. Existing here on the empathetic side, the do gooder side, the limp wristed, pinko commie and PC side, I should respect the Stupid's right to be stupid. Respect from me needs to be earned. Being stupid does not make the grade.

Keep it 'tween the Ditches ...................................

______________________________________________

Ok Boomer

Though Jeff and I are FB friends and tend to lean the same direction politically, we often clash. It’s like we are both on the same team but choose to shout at each other from different ends of the bench. We have engaged in heated and sometimes hurtful exchanges.

I ran across this Facebook meme on the left on Jeff’s page. It asks an unrelated question based on suppositions not even alluded to in the body of the rant. 

A 26 year old millennial is complaining about the planet sized shit bag they are expected to own now that they are productive members of our society. These are predictable complaints with a few new ones I had not considered thrown in for good measure. He is not impressed with what is being handed off. He is in no way indicating his generation would like to die.

I have to agree with him. It must suck to be facing the looming disasters that lurk in the not so distant future. He and his generation will be required to face the many bad results of previous generations’ poor choices and lousy stewardship of the planet.

So, rather than get huffy over the fact they are casting their evil eye on me, the Boomer who is leaving them the shit show of their futures, I just smile and nod my head. They are right to be pissed, put upon, and letdown.  It seems to be one of the predictable results for every generation to be disappointed in the generations that preceded them. They are wrong though if they feel they are the only generation to inherit dangerous problems and headaches.

The World and all that is in it has always been a dangerous place. There will never be an end to the disasters, mayhem, and mistakes waiting in the shadows to take us out.  Human kind has always been its own worst enemy. That will never change. Every generation is faced with challenges they either choose to address or ignore.  Most seem to take on a few yet kick the can down the road on others unless that problem has become too prominent and full of disaster to not address.

My generation addressed many wrongs back in the day.  Sadly, many of the wrongs and world ills they at least identified became nothing more than guilty footnotes instead of positive action.  Like the many generations before them, my generation aged out of idealistic youth and was forced to face Reality full on. The “what we should be doing stuff” was relegated to guilty after thoughts overshadowed by meeting mortgages and raising the generational ingrates of the future.  It is a never-ending loop humans cannot escape.  We cannot expect to get off scot free when the kids we weaned grow up and see us for who we really are, flawed and not the pinnacles of stability they knew us to be when they were eight.

Regardless, I am more optimistic now than I was 30 years ago about a generation and the one following it.  Finally after a blank of 60 years since Boomers actually did work for positive change, Millennial’s and the younger Gen Z kids seem to be as serious about how screwed up the world is as I was when I was their age.

The world I lived in when I was 26 seemed just as hopeless at times as it does now. And by all accounts, it has not gotten better. But that is Life sometimes. To survive, we have to dig in while we bitch and complain.  The rule is piss and moan all you want, just do not give up.

I look at living as a battle to defeat Life and the inevitable misery that is part of it.

Keep it ‘tween the ditches …………………………….

Tulsa Race Massacre

100 years ago seems like a long time.  And it is.  But 100 years is not long enough for some of the ugliness of our collective past to have faded into the shadows that hide memories long forgotten.  Some tragic injustices will not stay hidden no matter how well they are covered up.

The Tulsa Race Massacre, which began 100 years ago today, is a perfect example of such evil. If America is even half ass serious about changing our future, the nation needs to face its past, warts and all.  No more Pollyanna history books.  No more glossing over the genocide of a native population and certainly we can no longer contend that slavery was no big deal and hasn’t been an issue for 160 years. 

We need to admit to the injustices our country committed as well as the wonderful events that made us a great country.  Until we face our past, good and evil, our true greatness will never be realized.

Later ......................................

You Can Pound It With a Hammer

 

A popular ad on TV when I was living in Tampa, Florida at the age of nine or ten was a commercial about the last paint job anyone would ever need for their house, place of business or tar paper shack out in the swamp. It was called Armorlite I think. (For purposes of the story, we'll just go ahead and call it that.)

In the break between prime time shows like "Leave it to Beaver," "Perry Mason" or the "Jack Benny Show", a salesman with a snake oil slick voice contended the greatest paint in the world now existed. His convincing baritone demeanor insisted we were fools to not immediately book a crew of Armorlite professionals to apply this fantastic new product on our beautiful homes and businesses.  Armorlite would last forever and a day and was guaranteed for that long.  Lifetime worry-free paint job. Nothing better in this or any other Universe.

Visual proof action videos ensued of a burly guy pounding the paint with a hammer while the slick salesman overdubbed,"This paint is so rugged you can pound it with a hammer."

Scene then switched quickly to hurricane force winds driving obstacles at the newly applied paint and when the happy homeowners emerged from their hurricane ravaged homes, the paint was just fine.

The commecial blitzkrieg lasted a long time.  Long enough at least have an impact on the conversations of two bored ten year olds scuffling heel first back towards Johnny C's house. Reaching his house meant we had to pass our favorite hobby shop, the name of which escapes me now.

Johnny noticed the Ford Econline van parked next to the hobby shop and all the ladders leaned up to the back of the concrete block building.  On those ladders were guys with spray guns spraying some god awful smelling liquid on the rear wall. 

Whenever time was not pressing, we always gave the hobby shop some solid loitering time.  We'd walk around inside fingering cool hobby stuff until Gruff hobby shop guy booted us out.  He was gruff, but not an asshole.  I actually liked the guy. 

He finally told us it was time to move along.  Before we left, Johnny C asked him, " Are those guys painting with that new paint we see on TV? My dad told me they had painted the garage where he twists wrenches. The smell here smells just like Dad's garage."

Gruff hobby shop guy nodded confirmation and we exited the store.

Outside we stopped and watched the men as they painted one section, finished, moved all their scaffolding and ladders and began on a new section.  The two of us watched for some time, often bothering whoever would listen with questions like, "Can you really hit it with a hammer?"  Or, "How long does it take to dry" and "Will the smell go away".  The Armorlite pros eventually became weary of our questions and told us to beat it.

Both Johnny and I forgot about the hobby shop for quite awhile.  One of us must have seen another commercial and connected dots that led the two of us to make an early in life bad decision. At some point after school one day, either Johnny or I suggested we test the paint out on the hobby shop.

"Cool. Let's do it"

One of us surely said something akin to , "But we don't have hammers."

I can remember talking while we walked in the direction of the hobby shop.  We were both pumped and seriously considering how this test would unfold.  Neither of us wanted to go home for hammers we might lose and then all Hell would break loose. So we decided to use rocks.  

Rocks were like hammers.  I had actually relied on rocks several times to help construct various forts in trees, in the pucker and one really cool fortification on an island in the mangrove swamps that rimmed Tampa Bay just to the south of my house.

We walked the last so many hundreds of yards looking at the ground and collecting rocks we thought might suit the job at hand.  You just don't get accurate throwing results from just any rock.  A good throwing rock has to fit the palm just so.  The weight, heavy enough to have some impact, but no so big it was tough to throw.  A lot to consider when choosing decent rocks to toss.

We approached the store from the rear.  The plan was for one of us to throw rocks and the other to judge the result.  And then we switch out and do it again and again and again until we ether proved the commercial or debunked it.

The paint was some rugged.  Throwing small skipping type stones appeared to have no impact.  Frustrated now that my pockets were empty, I grabbed a brick from over near the dumpster. The brick chipped the Hell out of that wall.

Johnny and I decided the test was incomplete.  One chip does not mean much, especially since we went over kill and heaved a brick at it.  Surely they did not mean bricks.  We left the immediate area and sought more rocks a little larger than skipping rocks but still smaller than a brick.  

As it turned out, rocks just shy of half brick size could chip the paint nine times out of ten.

That's when this comedy stepped up its game.  The store owner appeared.  

I remember stopping in mid throw when he asked, "What the Hell are you two doing?"  Johnny and I dropped our rocks and turned to face him. Glaring at us, he again said, " Well, what are you doing?  I just had the store painted. "

Retroactive awareness does nothing to address current problems self inflicted out of stupidity.  I immediately understood that trouble was here and I was in the middle of it. Understanding trouble was not going to help going forward.  But I tried to mitigate its damage with an explanation.  

"Uh, we were testing the paint to see if the claim was true."

"What claim?"

Johnny spoke up. "You know, the ad on TV that claims you can hit the paint with a hammer and not damage it."

Gruff hobby shop guy walked over to the rear wall to look at it.

"Jesus Christ.  You kids destroyed the paint job"  He turned toward me.

Funny how when it really counts, adults never seem to understand the logic of children. "What is your name and phone number?  I will be calling your parents.  And don't even think of lying to me.  And don't even think of running.  I will catch you."

I squirmed uncomfortably under his glare.  I turned toward Johnny to seek some support.  Johnny had turned tail and all I saw was the back of him disappearing in the distance. I would have to take the hit alone or run away like Johnny.  I chose to stay.  I think it was because of the stressed sound of the store owner's voice. I knew we had really screwed up.  

I looked at the store owner and he looked at me.  I remember giving him my name, phone number and address before I also turned tail and ran home.

I had found serious trouble and dragged Johnny along with me.  I did not give up his name to the store owner.  My parents figured "the other kid" had to be Johnny.  It only took one question from Dad and I was spilling my guts.  I had learned by that time in my short life that my father valued truth above all else. Lying was a betrayal.

Johnny's father refused to help pay for repainting the rear of the hobby shop.  Dad fronted all the money and I was out my allowance for the better part of the next year.  There was grounding and a month's worth of disgusted looks to bear, but over all I thought my parents handled it well.  

Johnny showed up at school on the following Monday with a black eye and serious bruises on his arms.  He often showed up to school damaged in some way.  I would find out later his father hit him and his older sister quite often.  

I was not allowed in their house after that nor was I allowed in the hobby shop ever again.

Later .....................................................

A Purging Alcohol Infused Retrospective

Angry and confused, the rank and file found themselves uselessly milling around tired monuments to nonexistent alternate realities. With frantic breaths, they screamed at everyone nearby that what happened to them was a travesty like none other in the continuum of Time and Space. They are positive they have been egregiously wronged.  Why else would they be so upset fer chrissakes? 

It does not matter that Heaven Sent Overlord misinformed them with lies and outrageous innuendoes. He claimed not only had he been cheated, but worst of all, so had they been scammed and were now left without the greatest leader ever to grace the planet. 

Calling them to arms in so many words, he tells them the only way to take their country back is to fight for it.  He makes no mention of the four year lie he foisted upon the land he claimed to love. Each repeated lie that passed his lips fires up a nervous and angry crowd, soon turning them into a lynch mob.  Once they have heated up nicely, he sends them forth to breach the walls of a country he assures them is set steadfast against them. 

So they marched. They were not so useless now, by God! 

Brandishing spear tipped poles with fluttering mixed messaged standards, they streamed awkwardly to barricades held in the tenuous hands of unprepared truncheon packing protectors of the Peace.  The Blue Line has no choice. They step aside.  And the mob was now at the door of this once fine example of a constitutional republic. 

I sat in front of the flat screen opened mouthed and watched this tragedy unfold. Mild shock quickly turned to outrage as I witnessed those same poles that had been so busy waving flags now turned into sharp weapons of blind hate and over the top discontent. 

I have never been so ashamed of my fellow citizens as I was on January 6, 2021.  And now, they want a pass.  Time to move on they say.  Their leader has been vanquished, so get over it.  We didn' t mean any harm.  Jes tryin to save the republic from the evil child eaters of the other side.  To all that I say................. 

Kiss My Ass! 

This was not a Big Deal.  It was a Huge Deal! Anyone who participated in this Treason should hang their heads and find dark corners to hide until the rest of us feel like dealing with your sorry asses.  

Personally, I will never forgive the GQP.

Call me Disgusted .................................................... 

Fear

For years I have had various ideas, observations and considerations float in and around the smoldering wreckage in my mind. Most often I don't really notice them other than a quick acknowledgement and then let them die in the swamp out back. But have enough "what if's", "what about's", and "only if's" pass by, eventually I was bound to stop everything and go, "Yeah, What about that?"

In the last four years, the notion of Fear and its pervasive, insidious grip on our national psyche has consistently been up front and in my face. America and yes, even a large charge of the World's population live every day in fear of something catastrophic ruining their day, their lives, their existence. Irrational fear that often cripples them and makes them prone to grasping any slim chance to escape the unknown and non-existent tragedy coming at them at warp speed. That makes for fertile ground where liars, scammers, and purveyors of Righteous Indignation ply their evil trades. Humans love to be afraid.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt was right when he said "All we have to fear is fear itself." Yet we have conveniently forgotten this basic truth. Meeting a challenge head on is certainly better than meeting one with doubts swirling around and poisoning our resolve.

I am not immune to fear. I have my favorites I pull up on occasion to fill that void when despair seems lacking. And while I wallow in my fears, I know it is a useless and destructive endeavor that is bound to not bring me closure, satisfaction or even gratification of any kind. Simply put, fear is a colossal waste of my time, as it is for most folks unless they are chained to wall with a greasy one eyed prison guard approaching them as he rubs his hands and declares, "We gonna have some fun tonight."

After reading my above scrawling on fear, my quiver of fear is again empty for the moment. I sit here a rational and clear headed man who knows that beating fear is more than half the battle. Yet part of me is already jonesing for more fear to replace that fear I just purged. I feel like an MC Escher painting looks. I keep climbing those steps and never leave the basement.

Keep it tween the 'ditches .......................................