Raising a Heathen

Roy Wrenn

My wife and I never really discussed it. Our own personal issues with organized religion in our past created the scenario though. 

At some points in both of our lives, we discovered that organized religion was not going to fit in with the paths we chose to follow. Because of our total disregard for Church on Sundays, our daughter grew up with no religious indoctrination. My wife and I did not do it consciously. We just did not place any importance on being subservient to a mythical entity.

When I was a child, seemed everyone went to church. The first kid I knew who had no religious affiliation was named Bobby. He came into my fourth grade class in Tampa after spending his first 10 years growing up in Bumfuck, Africa somewhere. He got a lot of shit from some kids in my class for not being a Christian.

I was an up and coming ever faithful member of the the Episcopal Church.  I invited Bobby to come to Church with me and my parents. He passed. Said his parents would have none of it. They were Atheists he said. I asked what an Atheist was. He said they don't believe in God.

More than a few years of Sunday school and wearing out my knees in genuflective prayer told me otherwise. I said as much and we got into a shoving match a teacher felt compelled to break up.

I told my parents about the dust up at dinner. Neither of them took my side. I remember one of them said religion is no reason to get into a fight. Matter of fact, it was probably the worst reason of all. Some people don't believe in God and that's fine. Forget it, they said. 

I forgot it and got on with my life. In less than a week, Bobby and I were friends again.

Several years later I left organized religion for good. The blatant hypocrisy on display every Sunday finally got to me. I never looked back with regret until .........................

So my 13 year old heathen daughter comes to us one day and asks if it is okay if she goes to church with a friend. Neither my wife nor I had a problem with it. Sure, go right ahead.

It was while she was out with her friend the next Sunday I harbored regrets about not giving her some exposure to religion yet. Then I realized that exposure had finally come, and she had initiated it. No coercion, just her curiosity. Perfect.

When she got home from her first brush with God, I asked her why had she wanted to go to church. She said her not going to church had some tongues wagging among her peers. She had been invited, so she went and now it's done. She did not seem interested anymore. 

I am not sure if she ever went to church again while living under our roof. I'm not sure because I just do not care. I respected her decision at age 13 and it ended there. I figure my heathen wife and I set the decent moral examples she needed to get rolling on the rest of her life. Now, she's on her own, and has been for years. She is a strong woman married to a strong man and they carry themselves like stand up citizens should. ................

........... And religion had nothing to do with it.

___________________________________

I was all set to use R.E.M.'s "Losing My Religion" for this post. Then I noticed nearby waiting for just this moment, "Where Ya Gonna Be" , by Charlie Parr was waiting barely able to contain itself. I just had to let it replace REM. No one picks quite like Charlie.