Tuesday, November 16, 2010

You're Just A F***king Chick Magnet

What with my inability to keep the real life madness from getting out of control and my tendency to ignore it when it does, when I do decide to take care of business, all other facets of my life including and but not exclusively this blog, well, they fall into disprepair and begin gathering dust. 

If that paragraph made any sense, then maybe the rest will.  If it didn't, then I guess I am circling the airport in my own special holding pattern and will continue to do so until the fuel runs out.  Sure hope I land in the water.

Anyway, my previous post about manic/depression was, well, it was what it was.  I wrote it, posted it, and then went back to trying to get a handle on the real world that I exist in.  More construction madness, more bike shop madness, and then also trying to fit in a ride or two witrhout having to dodge bullets in the woods as the lone outdoorsmen do their best to actually kill something legal.

So I just read the comments on the previous post.  I also just opened my emails for the first time in several days.  I thought I had finally gotten free of the internet babes who used to stalk me five or six years ago.  Apparently they were just giving me a break.   Once again I have to fend off the women who clamor at my internet door.  And now instead of just dealing with them as email spam, I have them finding me on T-Ten, the writing site, my blog, and again in my emails.

Must be the weight loss.  It's the only thing new about me that might even entice the ladies beyond their normal detached disregard.   I suddenly did not get taller.  I just did not win the lottery.   If it is the weight loss, then how the Hell did they know?  I have not posted any new images of the svetlter and slimmer me.  And besides, my new body is anything but skinny, it's just a tad skinnier...............Hmm......................

Okay.  I think there are spies in the pucker around my house using long range radios to update Home base on the MRMacrum status.  I imagine a whole coven of women dedicated to keeping tabs on me.  Has to be.  Couldn't be arbitrary and just my time again to get hit up for my credit card number so they can squeeze non existent money from it and leave me drained, a pitiful dried up carcasses in their wake.  Nah, that couldn't be it.

As BBC commented in my last post, "You're just a fucking chick magnet".

Well just don't tell my wife.  She might laugh.


The Blog Fodder said...

You get ads for women. Lucky you.
I keep getting penis extender ads. I tell Tanya she must be complaining on the internet. If I used them all and they all worked, I could throw it over my shoulder and go to a Halloween party as a gas pump.

Kulkuri said...

Permanent magnet or electro-magnet?? How do you pry them loose??

I got spam recently that I think was pushing used large penises. Didn't open it, just going by the subject line. Should have saved the subject line at least, might have been able to do a post on it.

Chef Cthulhu said...

Blog Fodder - maybe there's a link. Perhaps Crummy gets the chicks because he's already been "super-sized".

Randal Graves said...

Dude, what's your secret? Gotta do something with the giant member I'll have once I order those pills using my vast Nigerian wealth.

The Blog Fodder said...

Maybe he just licks his eyebrows

Demeur said...

What no porno film offers? With those attributes I would be depressed.

El Cerdo Ignatius said...

Randal: Gotta do something with the giant member I'll have once I order those pills using my vast Nigerian wealth.