The Death Glare

Back around 1965, Snake's mother June once told me I should tell my mom that I could probably use some Adderall to rein in the ADHD symptoms I seemed to share with her son. Because of me, she felt the prescription was not doing what it should be doing to control his inattentive manic pubescent behavior. She was sure my presence in his life was the problem and the reason he wasn't responding to his new prescription.  I said nothing, while behind her back, Snake started a silent snicker as he disappeared into their kitchen.

June did not have a clue that most days, both Snake and I were taking Adderall, not for the good it might do, but for the buzz it gave us. That summer we sneaked out quite often and rode the rear bumper of the Washington Post delivery truck as it delivered bundles of newspapers in and around Bethesda, Maryland.. Adderall helped us stay awake and keep what wits we had at age14, sharp and aware. Adderall, aka, amphetamines, laughing gas and alcohol were my gateway drugs. 

On the off chance that I might score my own supply of Adderall, one night at the dinner table I mentioned June's concerns about me possibly having ADHD. Well, .............. I created a shit storm that became quite ugly as the two mothers exchanged harsh words and heated vitriol on several phone calls over the next week or so. 

Mom made me sit with her through that first call before the dinner plates had been cleared. Each time my mother spoke, the death glare she used when really pissed, intensified .... I had to avert my eyes when she turned it on me. Sparks did not fly out of her eyes, but it hurt nonetheless.

Who knew she would fly off the handle like this? Even my father was surprised. After the initial feather ruffling, he chuckled. Mom immediately turned that death glare on him. He quickly found a reason to disappear. Not his fight, not his battle; he retired to the kitchen for a shot of whiskey. It seemed the prudent thing to do.

Who was June to interfere with the raising of her son? She was no doctor. And besides, why is it always her sons who were singled out as the bad influences? She was fed up with the false accusations disguised as the "good intentions"of neighbors and strangers. Her son..... and then another death glare shot in my direction .... I was not the problem. Jim (Snake) was a juvenile delinquent loser who would never be anything but a loser.   Loud heated words erupted from the phone receiver. Mom slammed the phone down and shot another death glare over my bow ........... Snake and I were now banned from hanging with each other. ....... Forever.

The ban did not last. The Montgomery County school system requested I not return for my sophomore year, so I ended up at Charlotte Hall Military School. Snake had already been there for a year.

I never did get that Adderall script nor did I ever see a doctor about what I know now was ADHD. Mom did not believe in many of the new-fangled notions swirling around in the Psychiatry vats at the time that insinuated boys were not to blame for their behavior. Yeah, I could be crazed, but so had my brothers been crazed. They grew out of it. She was sure so would I.

I had one reason for telling this story. Now, more than a few paragraphs in, the single reason has been misplaced and in its stead are several tangents I just cannot get a grip on. 

Hmm. ......... I wonder now if I ever did outgrow my ADHD. 

Keep it 'tween the ditches ...............................................

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I first googled "songs about amphetamines". Lo and behold, I found one that is not great by any stretch of the imagination. It was the band name, "The Vibrators",  that sucked me in and then their heavy punk beat combined with simpleton lyrics that made "Amphetamine Blue" the perfect pick. Had this song been out when I was in high school, it might just have been one of our anthems.

Rock on!