A Great Man's Downfall

I think I have finally figured it out.  It had been bothering me for quite awhile.  But after stumbling upon the photo to the Right, the pieces began to fall into place.

First some background.............

He was raised to be a good Conservative in a family whose Conservative values stretched back through the years more than a few generations.  His family affluence provided him with the nurturing atmosphere of privilege and he wanted for nothing.  All that was expected of him was to go forth into the World and do his best to, as historian Gregory Schneider put it, "Defend Western civilization from the challenges of modernist culture and totalitarian governments".

He went to all the right schools, met all the right people (Conservatives of course), married, had children, and proceeded to find his place in the World.  It was determined fairly early on he had no nose for business.  What else was there for a good Conservative to put his mind to but politics.  After all, the way had been paved by his family and their years long involvement in National politics.

He started out small in a big state.  His success there impressed the movers and shakers entrusted with bringing America back to its roots of God fearing Conservatism.  They saw in him a chance to turn around 8 years of Liberal sabotage at the hands of a semi pink philanderer.  They pushed him, prodded him and through creative vote counting courtesy of his brother,  managed to place him at the helm of the USS America.  May God shed his light on thee.

So what happened?  Why, with all the pedigree, all the support, all the connections, did this once fine Conservative become a pariah in his own movement?   Instead of decreasing the size of government, he allowed it to grow.  Instead of pinching pennies and keeping the deficit under control, he invaded other countries and spent money like a good Democrat.  Oh he tried to keep up appearances by appearing somewhat dim and disconnected like many of his peers seem to love.  But something had happened behind the scenes.  Some insidious moment, some Left Wing influence, some evil from the progressive side had infiltrated his soul.

When I came upon the above photo, I figured it out.  He was seduced by one of the darker evils from the Left.   He became an avid cyclist.   He didn't just ride a bike for the positive polling a kodak moment on a bike might bring.  The man fell in love with riding a bike.  And to make matters worse, he did not stop at the almost okay anal retentive roadie stage, like so many of his peers seemed to think was acceptable.  He became a mountain biker.  A type of cycling whose roots go directly to the hippie dippy pot smoking whackoes of Marin County in California.  It is a known fact that all mountain bikers either smoke pot and think war is stupid, or they have smoked pot in the past and don't mind if others do.  Even if they support war now, at one time, they did not.  In other words, mountain bikers embody the worse kind of Liberalism - Live and let live.  They have been known to get drunk or stoned and ride naked.  They will often pull off the trail to share a doob and a clif bar.  They use terms right out of the 1960s and 70s - Dude, Stoked, Gnarly - all words of subversion, every one.

So folks and whoever else might catch this,  please find in your hearts some compassion for this man.  What he thought was but an innocent diversion and healthy activity was actually a commie conspiracy to undermine his efforts to turn back the clock to when America was greater than even it thought it was.  Forgive him his fall from grace and understand now how sneaky those Liberals really are.