Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Chock Full of Ideas
I was chock full of ideas for the blog yesterday. Yesterday, the day that went by in a blur. Yesterday, a day that was supposed to be a day off. The thoughts of things to write about came and went just like the day unfolded. In a blur.
Think I could remember a single one of them? Come on. Just one. One thought to wrap words around and display it to the World.
Jeez, I even had an interesting twist I came up with for the Shoe contest. That twist has left the station. Leaving but a wisp of itself behind to tease me. It will come back to me. It will reappear again as it has in the past. When both hands are engaged and all I can do is run with it in my mind.
But back to time off and I how I spend it. Seems I need to go back to work to rest up from my weekend. This has been the story of my life as a responsible functioning adult. Does not matter if the days off are filled with chores or fun, I never seem able to ramp myself back under the red line.
It has to be my years as a trucker. When I was single I pounded the super-slabs of North America sometimes several months in a row without a break. When time off came my way, I jammed as much fun, debauchery, and over indulgence into the free time as I could. A land starved sailor had nothing on me. Several months worth of paychecks went down the drains of sleazy bar bathrooms coast to coast and in all the provinces of Canada. (I think I hit all the Provinces. Okay most of them anyway. There's so many, must be 7 or 8 of them, I lost count.)
I married and became a good citizen but was still engrossed in my trucking career. Time off was owned and controlled by the "honey do" list. That list that never seemed to get shorter, only longer. I remember being glad to get back to the exhausting schedule of delivering America's goods so I could get some rest.
So what do I do? Do I look for a career change that will offer me more normal lifestyle type time off? No. I become a small business owner. The Einstein that I am, I figured if I owned a business, I could make the rules. Rules about leisure time being one of the key ones.
Right. I found out quickly that first time, you never own a business, it owns you. It has it's grips on you tighter than any boss at a mill or office. Working for someone else means you have an out. You can quit. Owning your own business offers no such option.
Oh, I guess I could quit. Close the doors. Walk away. But all those people I owe money to would find me. And they do not care if the business is closed or not.
Just like my life on the road, I still have very little time off. 7 days a week the shop is never out of my mind. Personal errands and honey do chores have to be interlaced between the hours spent running, worrying and planning the most efficient way to run my business. And since efficiency is not even close to my middle name, I guess it would be more accurate to say my well made plans settle for just keeping it running.