Saturday, April 15, 2006

Dear Bonehead

This is a letter I added to one my wife wrote to a young relative suffering the indignities and pain of detoxing from opiate addiction.

Dear Bonehead ( Name changed to protect the stupid)

I won't get up on my high horse, my pulpit to preach about the evils of substance abuse. For I have walked in your shoes myself. You did the drugs and now you pay the price. Been there, done that. If you are smart you will only put yourself through this one time. But if your previous lifestyle is any indication, the odds are against you. They were certainly stacked against me when I was young and dumb like you. I eventually prevailed and walked away from that loser lifestyle I was trapped in back in my teens and 20s. You will too. Or you won't. It is up to you and you alone.

When I decided to quit, at first I was all hung up about hurting and disappointing the friends and family who were concerned about me. I would anguish about letting them down. I would beat myself up. Then I felt so bad, I'd go get high to forget it. I was trapped into thinking I was a loser, Life sucked, Life was unfair, blah blah, blah. I hit rock bottom and I knew it. I finally decided that proving my worth to someone else was stupid if I couldn't prove it to myself first. So I did. I quit for myself. And for the next 30 years I have been relatively calm and stable. Of course your Aunt , my wife, might have a different opinion on the calm part. Maybe the stable part also.

What you are going through sucks. I would not wish it on anyone. But it is self inflicted stupidity. The solution needs to be self inflicted also. Good luck. But you don't need luck. You need a stronger backbone. It appears you are well on the road to finding one.

Keep it 'tween the ditches,

Uncle Mike