It was 1:30 or so in the AM when Fernando decided to rub his perpetually wet cold nose on my face. My eyes sprung open, my hands reached to throttle him, and my legs performed some sort of automatic move that brought me to my feet in about one second. "Goddamned cat. Come here you little shit. Waking me up. You wait you little bastard until I get my............." All the while my feet moved of their own accord towards the living room.
Automatic reflexes had kicked in as I simultaneously reached for the remote just as my lard butt hit the cushions of the couch. I flicked on the TV. It was still set on the same channel I had on over twlve hours earlier; one of those low rent Liberal news channels. Still half awake I struggled to focus on the graphic image on the screen. "That can't be right," I thought. I looked again and there it was, that's waht I'm talkin about, right there in Red and Blue - four more years of the O Man. Oh fuckin yeah. Immediately a heavy weight lifted off my shoulders and I became instantly wide awake. He frickin did it. The frickin bastard pulled it off. he and his boys were the smartest guys in the room after all.
I had gotten to the point in this election a few weeks ago when I couldn't stand to hear Romney speak. It drove my wife bonkers. As soon as one of his ads or speech segments came on I made a mad dash to the remote to mute his voice. I could not listen to him anymore. But I sat there on the couch a few hours ago and live in person as it happened, listened and watched Mitt Romney concede the race to his arch rival. It was the best concession speech I have ever heard. He stood tall all alone and looked presidential when he gave it. His words were upbeat and I could tell he probably meant every word. Props to the Mitt. He fought hard. When it came time to admit defeat he sucked it up and handled with dignity, grace and whole lot of class..
Turns out Fernando did me a favor. He must have had his cat like radar tuned into the other universe that really dictates ours. In that other universe, all things past are forgotten, but anything coming is known in advance by at least five minutes before it makes here for our consumption. He was just looking out for my interests because he is one of my true buds. So I snatched the little bastard up and gave him a ten minute belly rub. Both of us were happy now.
Okay, it's time to move along now and get on with it.................................
6 comments:
Damn, it sounds like casa Marcrum is a parallel universe for the Ol"Buzzards cabin. For at least three weeks I have refused to listen to the news programs going on and on about the election. Last night I went to bed about ten and fell asleep. At quarter after one I woke up to pee - the cat sleeps on the foot of our bed, complained (but she is eighteen years old and has earned the right to be a cranky crone.) I headed for the bathroom and turned on the TV as i past. They were announcing Obama reelected. I yelled for the wife: she came down with the cat following and complaining - we had toast and tea and the cat got her belly rubbed while we watched the outcome.
the Ol'Buzzard
Ditto here regards sick of hearing his arrogant mouth in motion. I decided I wasn't going to torture myself last night and went to bed when whatever station I was watching showed Ohio in the red.
It wasn't one of the cats, but rather my oldest daughter screeching in the living room that woke me. I went back to bed a happy and unburdened man. I forewent the concession speech, however...I still can't listen to the lying bastard. You are better men than I in the forgiveness department.
I went camping....
I think they just wanted to keep it interesting so they said it was going to be close..just glad it's over with ..and thought all the political cartoons would be done with...but noooo, there are a passel of them making fun of the republicans..
You probably took the smarter approach, turning off all media. I did the opposite. For the past month I was glued to several news sites, going into panic mode every time I saw another one of their Pavlovian headlines. "The race is tightening!" "Romney is pulling ahead in Ohio!" "Obama's firewall has disappeared!"
I'd panic, and click over to Intrade and Nate Silver just for reassurance.
God I'm glad this is over.
Ol'Buzzard - The wave from that parallel universe must have started east of me since you woke up 45 minutes before me. Forget that, isn't giving a cat a good belly rub a great way to relieve tension?
jadedj - You missed the best one he made the whole campaign.
BBC - Dammn you. Damn you all to Heck.
JACKIESUE - If any election was a "Take no prisoners" election, this is the one. I would expect the gloating to continue for awhile. Sad really. But there it is.
Tom Harper - It isn't over really. I think it is but another chapter.
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