I am convinced now that we often end up getting what we deserve even if what we get seems to happen for no good reason.
Take for instance the picture of the expensive and almost new broken bike part. When it broke and left me without the means to finish the off road ride last Thursday, I went with the flow of it. Shit happens. Parts break.
A good friend who was riding with us bailed from the ride with me. I walked and he rode to his house which was nearby. He gave up his ride to give me a ride back to the bike shop. He also loaned me a spare wheel so that I could ride the following Sunday while my rear wheel waited for parts. That's what good friends do for each other.
From bad moments, good Karma has a way of smoothing out the rough spots. Being dense and stupid, I often do not realize or appreciate these good moments. This was one of them.
Saturday morning a few of us, my friend included, were going to do a quick road ride. Unfortunately, the pre-ride conversation turned into one of heated political debate. My friend took a stand. I took another. Ten minutes later I stepped off the edge and let my temper ruin the ride and strain the friendship. Instead of shutting up and riding, which is our basic rule, I chose to carry my chip hard. The ride only lasted 5 minutes. My friend went home pissed. I sat in the darkened bike shop and brooded.
I searched my mind for the reason I was so upset. Certainly this political argument was not the reason, but only the result. It finally dawned on me I have been wound so tightly of late, I needed to relieve some of the pressure. A struggling business can do that to a man.
Taking it out on a good friend is not the way to do it though. Why then have I consistently pulled this kind of crap over the years? It does not happen often, but I have a history of this going back as far back as I can remember. Unbridled and unreasonable anger followed by serious regret.
Okay, so I have established that I have it in me to be a total jerk. And what's my point?
Everything comes full circle.
My friend and I worked out our differences. I put the wheel he loaned me on my mountain bike. And what happens? The same part that broke on my wheel broke on his wheel while I was using it. Only this time we were miles from the bike shop in the middle of the biggest cloud of black flies in York County, Maine. As I slowly worked my way out of the woods and the black flies, all I could do was smile. There is always payback. I deserved this. This is what happens to jerks.